New Perspectives

LETTER TO MY FRIEND, T

T was G's MBA course-mate at MIT in 1998. He was the youngest in the course and was like a brother to G and I. T is funny, witty, always generous with his treats, and he loves food. As you can guess, T is a big guy, with a big heart.

T lives in the "Land of Smiles", where there is recently a clash of colours and idealogy that has not reached closure. In less turbulent times, I have been drawn to the local food, the spas and especially the shopping there.

Each time, T would be the perfect host, taking me out, buying me dinners, with a pre-booked massage at to round off the day, a boon to my aching feet.

Being the itinerant traveller, I have also ended up taking him to places in his own country which he has not checked out before, like the notorious back-packers' haunt where needles and substances are shared and eating sharks' fins in back alleys. I have even taken the water-bus on the river where you have barely sitting room in a boat packed with locals going about their day-to-day activities, on routes which are not covered by land transport. T admitted that he has never done this before and will not be inclined to do so ever.

When he is not otherwise at work, T would indulge in gadgets and toys, big and small. We are constantly entertained by T's latest acquisition or interest. There is also a creative side of T - he takes beautiful photos and composes interesting music. Once, we did a comparison of the photos we'd both taken, of the same scene. His were good, mine were quickly deleted.

Now T is feeling sad. He hides it behind a weak smile and hectic work schedule. He wants to be kept so busy that he will not have intervals to lapse into a reverie of melancholy. Unrest in the country also spells uncertainty in whether the proper rule of law will be administered, and whether life will continue in the way it used to be. T has seen many coups, real and attempted, in his country in the past, and that is not the reason for his current mood.

When you have been so close to another person whom you consider a soul-mate and poured out so much of yourself to her, it is hard when she is no longer around to be that soul-mate. It is even harder when she becomes the soul-mate of another. T tries to rationalise with his head, but his heart does not agree.

To objective eyes, it was one of those relationships that "did not work out". T had so much to give - his love, his gifts, his whole self. But sometimes, even that is not enough. Love has to be reciprocal, a give-and-take. Otherwise, it is shallow, superficial, and will eventually fall apart.

T is afraid to "love again." It is a safe approach to take, so that he does not get hurt. But the highest form of love is unconditional.

For many people, the Christian faith defies logic because the basis of that faith rests on a loving God who created a perfect world, but the human heart is imperfect. God's law demands that the punishment for sin is death, and no human, by his own conduct and merit, is able to atone for his own sins. So God makes the supreme sacrifice - His own Son, who takes on human form, goes through everything a man experiences, but does no sin. He will be the perfect sacrifice to redeem mankind. He dies a most horrible and painful death on the cross, beaten and broken, bearing all the sins of mankind for all time. He is buried, and on the third day, He rose from the dead and this same Jesus is now living, in heaven, ready to embrace anyone who believes and calls upon Him. Still, that love demands something in return - that we recognise what God has done and believe in it. That something is called faith.

T, I want you to know that you are very special, and very dear to us. It is our prayer that you will know that Jesus loves you too. It is not about doing "good" or trying to abstain from things you know are bad for you, anyway. It is a relationship and getting to know who Jesus is, and your true identity as a child of God. One day, you will know...sometimes it takes a while, even years, but you will know because prayers are always heard.

God is also very sad when we reject Him and what He has done for us. But it doesn't mean He stops loving us when we do that.

T, this is for you, from the bottom of my heart. I love you, my dear friend.