Reflections on Dad For Father's Day - June 2011
Dad left us suddenly without saying goodbye.
It was a silent heart attack.
In life, he was a man of few words.
We seldom saw eye to eye.
It was a difference in perspective,
But so fundamentally different.
I was simply voicing my views,
Which did not correspond to his.
Why did I choose to focus on the negative,
and failed to see the obvious?
Dad has never complimented me
But there would be a hint of a smile,
a light in the eyes,
when he attended my graduation,
and later gave me away at my wedding.
I hungered for words of affirmation,
and when they did not appear,
I blamed Dad for falling short.
Who is a perfect Dad anyway?
He is the one whom you call your father.
Dad may not be able to love me the way I'd expected,
but he did what he could and in the best way he knew how.
Now that he is gone, I missed his silence; his not being around.
I wrote the eulogy for his funeral and was grateful for the opportunity
to say the things I did not say earlier.
Perhaps Dad was also like me, waiting and longing to hear those words
-which were not spoken when they ought to be.
Someday I will see Dad again, and have a second chance
to tell him how sorry I am for the insensitive things I've said and done,
and that I love him for loving me in his own way.
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