Love Circle 307 – 10 Years On
In The Beginning
Gim Guan and I were like any other couple setting foot into ME House that weekend in August 2005 – curious, expectant, but silently also filled with some trepidation and a whole lot of ” watzitallabout?”
We met 6 other couples during the retreat, and it marked the beginning of a journey of learning, growing and loving our families. There were 3 presenting couples who wore their hearts on their sleeves and shared poignantly about their own struggles in their marriage. I was struck by how real they were and how brave – to share their deepest and intimate secrets with a bunch of strangers, just so we can be helped along and not drift mindlessly into the deep abyss of estrangement ( as many do ).
That weekend was one of the most introspective, heart-rending, intense time of my life. As we dialogued, we hugged, laughed and cried. Some questions were tough, and some we’d rather not talk about, but it all came out. We walked out of ME House with a spring in our step and enveloped by a soft glow of tenderness towards our other half.
The Middle Years
This LC deserves a clap for commitment – to food, fun, fellowship and the occasional dialogue. It is a joy to bond over “makan” and sometimes it was just that. Our group was casual, laid-back and over time, we felt comfortable enough with everyone else to talk about problems and personal issues. One of the presenting couples, Patrick and Rachel, continued to be our mentors. We learnt valuable life lessons from each other. In the meantime, we saw our children develop from toddlers to antsy teens to fine young men and women in the making.
Now We are 10
Still meeting, still eating. Our children have grown a little taller; we have grown a little greyer and thicker around the waist. But what a decade it has been! I scroll through our dialogue journals, and feel that touch of nostalgia and fuzziness as I recap what we have written about each other.
There’s one excerpt I like – ” How Do I Define a Successful Marriage? My answer – Fidelity, mutual love and respect, underscored by a commitment to make it work. It is one where there are open channels of communication, transparency, friendship and fun; being married to my best friend”.
Here’s to LC 307 and to the many couples who are embarking on this journey. May you find your personal answer to that same question, and be better off for it.
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